I can't control or fix or change a lot of things and I guess some of that stresses me out. I can't make everyone better, or pray hard enough for trials not to come our way, or keep everyone safe, or make sure everyone learns what they are being taught, or control who gets our loved ones attention, or have my kids meet the right people, or make sure that people we love and care about don't delete us from their lives. I worry like I'm sure we all do. I tuck those feelings deep down and put on my happy face and think positive and have faith that everything will be okay. But...those feelings are real and they are there and no matter how hard I try not to be bothered by them...my body knows and lets me know. The doctor put me on high blood pressure medicine a few weeks ago too and that ticks me off. I have enjoyed not having to take medicines. I loved being healthy and always having good check ups. I was happy that I didn't have to depend on taking medicines to keep me healthy.
I'm not sure how to free myself from the stress. Do we ever really free ourselves from it all? I don't think it's possible but I am hoping that I will figure out a way to ease what's going on inside me. I seriously don't think that things are bothering me and I don't feel stressed but my body and especially my hands and blood pressure tell me different. I'm amazed at our bodies...they are pretty darn smart.
Today I met my cute friend Jodi to go see our friend Robin. I was close to the hospital and was planning on going and checking on Robin while we were up that way. I was glad that Jodi text to see if I wanted to go with her. I was watching Behr while Kimleighel got her teeth cleaned and checked and the timing was just about right and so we met. I loved seeing Jodi hold my cute grand and love on him. It makes my heart do amazing things. Carla, Jodi and Mallory all like holding my grands if they're around when I have them. That makes me happy. ☺ Robin was doing pretty good even though we woke her to visit with her. I hope that this experience will help her to change some things in her life. I want her around for a long time!
***Sunday in church I received a few thoughts that I think will help me with my stress. I am preparing to teach about the Atonement in a few weeks and the atonement is the answer. I need to trust in the Atonement and give my stress to Christ. I think a Priesthood Blessing would help too. It's crazy how I immediately think of having others get them but I'm not so good at asking for one myself.
In Relief Society our lesson fit right in and I know it is an answer to my problem. I took a picture of the board so I could remember better.
Recently I had heard we should meditate every day and I did it for a few days and then forgot. I really think that will help a ton. I know I also need to ponder and let my feelings be acknowledged and then give them up. I am always trying to improve my scripture study and I really liked the advice that was brought up today. *Set a time to read every day. I know when I write things down I am more apt to do them. *Start small...even just holding the scriptures..don't make it harder than it should be. *Find out what works for me. * Reward yourself....I'm thinking about having chocolate while I study the scriptures. *Write down questions I need answers to. *Use the study guide.
I do know that we find answers to our problems in the scriptures....truthfully I didn't realize I had such a problem. It's time to wake up and do something different. I also think a walk to the corner every day will help clear my mind and refresh my soul.
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