Sunshine

Today I am feeling very blessed and sweet memories of kindness are flooding my mind.

The other day when I was with Lorrilee celebrating her birthday and our friendship she told me that when I came through her door I was like "Sunshine" filling her room.  That reminded me that my mom had said something similar when I visited her while she was in rehab.  My mom has told me many times before that I was a breath of "Sunshine".  My friends from school (the younger ones) asked me if I had a middle name....or should they just call me "Sunshine".  I want to express how having that said about me makes me feel.  It makes me feel like I am doing something right.  It makes me feel loved and wanted.  It makes me feel special.  It makes me cry just a little with tears of joy.

I received a text from Karie Kennedy speaking for my cute younger friends from HS saying "You have blessed our lives....your happy spirit is contagious..."

Another friend send me this..."You like to compare yourself to others.....want to be enough....but you are much more....don't compare.....there is none.....You are More!"

Then I get comments on FB about how my "Light" is spread to many.....many more than I will ever know.  All this kindness makes my heart burst with happiness.  I love being seen this way!  Even TJ was talking to Trichelle and their friends saying how he appreciated me for accepting them the way they are and not criticizing or judging them.

I was at my friends house last night with Kimi, Jared and Larry.  My friend has been sick and has had a lot of challenges and needed a blessing.  I volunteered my sweet hubby.  While we were there Kimi said: "I am so cute....look how cute I am".  She had just performed her Orchestra Concert and was feeling great about herself.  My friend and I laughed and wished that we too could be so confident and happy with ourselves.  I wonder why we don't see ourselves as others do?  Teresa and I talked about it for a minute.  Others see the good in us....our "Sunshine" and focus on that.  They know the weakness is there also but that's not where their eyes look.....the eyes see and focus on the good.  We, however know the weakness oh so well and that is where our own eyes seem to look and stay.  Why is it so hard to accept our goodness and our own "Sunshine"?   I wonder if somewhere along in life we are told we shouldn't....that if we do we our prideful.....or vain.....or wrong.  I wish that didn't happen.  Because of others love and kindness I am getting a glimpse at who I really am....through the eyes of others.....and my eyes are actually seeing it too.  I like what I see....I like how it makes me feel....I know that I am loved.....that I am special.....that I "Shine"....that I am more....much more than I have given myself credit for.

I believe we are all very similar and that this experience isn't unique just to me.  We are all special....and wonderful....and awesome......and enough.....and cute.....and loved!  Loved by our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ....loved by our family and friends.  What more could we ask for?